In my last blog post I talked about the idea of continuous change and enjoying the process and the journey – and that nothing is ever perfect or complete. I listened to this talk on You Tube this morning by the beautiful Dara Dubinet and she discussed finding the positives in our changing situations and I felt like I wanted to build on this topic and say that everything is always going to be changing and we shouldn’t get into the mindset of labeling some change as good and some change as bad. We should try and get comfortable with the idea of change as a positive thing that is just part of life and try not to view it as something negative.
I think we can sometimes struggle with the idea of things changing but everything is always going to be changing. When you stay in the same place for too long then things can get stagnant and you can get stuck and that is when problems like depression can sink in. When you are in constant action or movement and are staying flexible with the ‘flow’ of life it is hard to feel down or for other negative things to take hold.
This is not too say that you should be busy for the sake of being busy. We should never hold onto anything because we fear the space or emptiness. Without any space it is hard for new, interesting things to come into our lives. I think sometimes people hold on to things that are no longer serving their best interests because they are fearful of change and things being different. Holding onto anything out of fear is never a good thing. Nothing belongs to us or is ours to hold onto forever that goes for jobs, houses, our belongings, and even people that we are in relationships with or our children – anything can change or be taken away from us at any moment.
We also shouldn’t fear pain or losing ourselves in our emotions. Sometimes substantial change or awakening comes from periods of pain or hardship. Numbing yourself to the pain or deep change means that you get can stuck. Even if someone passes or is not longer physically in our lives they will forever hold space in our hearts. They will always be with us.
So get comfortable with change – if it brings pain – feel it! move through it and keep flowing. Never stay paralyzed in fear. Everything around us will always be changing as so should we.
Dara Dubinet on change:
(Photo: Frank Oschatz)